| General etiquette in the forum. | |
| (My Thanks To Anna Hayward at Alt.Support.Autism for letting us use this. You can visit them: Here) | |
| 1. | Asking Questions If you do not want a straight answer to a question, do not ask it! An AC/AS will answer a question when asked. They cannot be expected to know that the question may be rhetorical, or that you only want certain answers. If you are afraid of people's opinions, will take presumed criticism badly or expect vague pleasantries, this forum may not be the appropriate place for you With a mixture of AS and NT on this board you will get just that, a mix of responses. |
| 2. | Are you being insulted? Please be careful before assuming a poster is being insincere, attempting to deceive, being sarcastic, trying to irritate you, being arrogant, aggressive or being deliberately offensive. It is more than likely the person is on the spectrum and doesn't realize that that is how they come across. For instance, a person posts that they are trying a dietary supplement on their kid. Someone posts the question "Do you have scientific reasons for believing this supplement will work, or are you just gullible?" It would be easy to get very angry and "flame" the person for saying this (i.e. be very rude back). However, it is perfectly possible the poster is asking a genuine question, not realizing that you are not supposed to ask someone if they are gullible, and that by doing so, they are unintentionally implying that they think you are (and not realizing that "gullible" is a euphemism for very stupid, and consequently, an insult). Many things that may be "obvious" to you are nothing of the sort to an AC/AS. Also, many AC/AS, and posters with ASD tendencies, will have explosive tempers and may over-react or misread situations. People need to be understanding of that, and also realize that as fast as some of us blow up, we calm down again. It is best to develop a short memory, to match our short fuse. |
| 3. | "Black-and-white" Thinking Some AC/AS typically see the word in rigid, black-and-white terms, no grey areas. A statement is either wrong or right, good or bad, truth or lie. Hence, getting into a discussion with an AC/AS could be a frustrating experience, particularly if you interpret definitive statements for confidence, or even arrogance. If you want to win an argument with an AC/AS, you had better be logical. State your facts, argue your point of view, and if you argue well enough, you will commonly see the previously resolute AC/AS do a complete 180 degree turn on his or her former opinion. You see, it wasn't arrogance after all. It was just an AC/AS being autistic. |
| 4. | Negative statements on autism Any statements that refer to autism in a negative light are liable to provoke an angry, defensive reaction from an AC/AS. For instance, if a parent complains that it is terrible coping with an AC/AS child, many AC/AS adults take that as a personal insult of themselves as children. Many eloquent, apparently high functioning AC/AS on the forum were far less high functioning as children, and most have had challenging childhoods. They know what it's like to be a child with an ASD and will see things from the child's point of view. It would be very sad if people struggling to come to terms with an ASD diagnosis, for themselves or their loved-ones, were unable to express those contradictory, and frequently negative feelings. You are free to do so on this forum. However, be prepared for some possibly challenging and difficult reactions from those on the other side of the fence and try not to take such reactions personally. Remember: to you, autism might be a terrible tragedy. For many of us on the spectrum, it is just the way we are. |
| 5. | When making large posts It is understandable that with the types of discussions we have, at times it's necessary to make lengthy posts. Out of consideration to some of our AS/AC members it would be greatly appreciated if the paragraphs were spaced. It would make it easier to read and respond to. |
| |
More Books |
| |